Trading Up
Bear with me, this could be long. I have a lot I want to say.
This is a typical day. On any given day you can add Bryon or substitute his name for me, but this is supposed to be illustrative.
6:30-7 a.m.: Wake up and shower
6:45: Wake up Abby and fix her breakfast
7: Wake up Sam and Jake, fix their breakfast
7-7:15: Clean up breakfast dishes, layout kids' clothes
7:15-7:45: Beg kids to get dressed, get myself dressed
7:45: Collect and double check backpacks, put on kids' shoes
7:50-8: Load kids, backpacks, purses, laptop into car
8:10: Leave house
8:30: Drop Abby and Jake at daycare
8:40-9: Commute
9: Drop off Sam at summer camp
9:10: Get to work
9:10-12: Work
12-1: Errands, maybe lunch
1-3: Work
3: Sugar and caffeine break
3-5: Work
5: Leave work
5:10: Pick up Sam
5:10-6: Commute
6: Pick up Abby and Jake
6:20: Home
6:20-7: Make dinner
7-7:30: Eat
7:30-8:30: Clean up, baths, jammies
8:30: Watch Dexter
8:45-9: Give Abby her bottle, rock
9: Put Abby down
9-9:30: Tuck in Sam and Jake
9:30-10: Tidy up, organize for the next day
10: TV
10:15: Sleep
This schedule is missing some things - like laundry, housecleaning, watering the yard. But more importantly it is missing stuff like reading to the kids, dancing silly to loud music, making cookies, gardening, coloring, collecting lightning bugs, making S'Mores.
What I'm trying to say is that lately I am really noticing how my schedule is preventing me from being the best mom I could be. And frankly, as Sam gets older, the behaviors I dislike in him - he's impatient and irascible - he sees in me, and they are by-products of my unbalanced life.
This has been coming for some time. And interestingly it wasn't anything major that got me here. No missed school play, no crying kids, no ER visit. It was a flippant comment I made to someone about how I spend 25 seconds making Jake's breakfast and more than one hour commuting every day. The minute I said it I realized it wasn't anything to joke about, and I certainly wasn't proud of it.
Now I am not quite naive enough to think that if I were a full-time, stay-at-home mom that my life would be problem free. In fact I am certain I would be trading one set of problems for another, but frankly I'm ready for that trade. It's probably not a wise decision financially. The idea of trying to re-enter the workforce years from now terrifies me. But right now my kids are not getting the best of me and I think it is taking a toll on all of us.
This is a typical day. On any given day you can add Bryon or substitute his name for me, but this is supposed to be illustrative.
6:30-7 a.m.: Wake up and shower
6:45: Wake up Abby and fix her breakfast
7: Wake up Sam and Jake, fix their breakfast
7-7:15: Clean up breakfast dishes, layout kids' clothes
7:15-7:45: Beg kids to get dressed, get myself dressed
7:45: Collect and double check backpacks, put on kids' shoes
7:50-8: Load kids, backpacks, purses, laptop into car
8:10: Leave house
8:30: Drop Abby and Jake at daycare
8:40-9: Commute
9: Drop off Sam at summer camp
9:10: Get to work
9:10-12: Work
12-1: Errands, maybe lunch
1-3: Work
3: Sugar and caffeine break
3-5: Work
5: Leave work
5:10: Pick up Sam
5:10-6: Commute
6: Pick up Abby and Jake
6:20: Home
6:20-7: Make dinner
7-7:30: Eat
7:30-8:30: Clean up, baths, jammies
8:30: Watch Dexter
8:45-9: Give Abby her bottle, rock
9: Put Abby down
9-9:30: Tuck in Sam and Jake
9:30-10: Tidy up, organize for the next day
10: TV
10:15: Sleep
This schedule is missing some things - like laundry, housecleaning, watering the yard. But more importantly it is missing stuff like reading to the kids, dancing silly to loud music, making cookies, gardening, coloring, collecting lightning bugs, making S'Mores.
What I'm trying to say is that lately I am really noticing how my schedule is preventing me from being the best mom I could be. And frankly, as Sam gets older, the behaviors I dislike in him - he's impatient and irascible - he sees in me, and they are by-products of my unbalanced life.
This has been coming for some time. And interestingly it wasn't anything major that got me here. No missed school play, no crying kids, no ER visit. It was a flippant comment I made to someone about how I spend 25 seconds making Jake's breakfast and more than one hour commuting every day. The minute I said it I realized it wasn't anything to joke about, and I certainly wasn't proud of it.
Now I am not quite naive enough to think that if I were a full-time, stay-at-home mom that my life would be problem free. In fact I am certain I would be trading one set of problems for another, but frankly I'm ready for that trade. It's probably not a wise decision financially. The idea of trying to re-enter the workforce years from now terrifies me. But right now my kids are not getting the best of me and I think it is taking a toll on all of us.
posted by Romine Family at 9:33 PM
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