The Power of Surprise

For reasons I won't go into Sam and I went to IKEA late yesterday to get a new stand for our TV. If you've never been to IKEA, it's Swedish-inspired housewares, on the cheap. In my mind there are several reasons why IKEA is cheap. First, no one helps you. You could buy hundreds of pounds of merchandise and they give you your boxes and some twine and send you on your way. Most of the time you have to check yourself out. Secondly, you have to assemble everything. You could buy a box at IKEA and it would come in four boxes.

Today we 'reserved' our TV stand, which meant we would pay for the item then take the receipt to 'cash and carry,' where they would wheel the item to a loading dock so we could load it - ourselves. After we bought a $2 nightlight and a $4 tray we headed to cash and carry.

Since there was a 15-minute wait I went ahead and wheeled our tray and night light to the dock, got the car, parked in one of the precious few spots, locked the car and headed back in to get the TV stand. About that time I was approached by a Kris Kristofferson-esque man: "Did you see my carts when you pulled in here?"

What I thought he meant was "I put my carts here and now they are gone" but what he actually meant was "Do you realize I had this parking spot reserved because I left my carts here on the curb?"

"Actually, no. I didn't see them. Do you want me to move my car?" There was a free space two spots over. My offer was sincere, but I really didn't think he'd take me up on it.

"Yes I would. I really don't want to have to move my carts. Is that all you have?" he asked me.

My normal, sarcastic self would've said "Yes, it is. I took up this spot in the loading dock so I wouldn't have to walk across the parking lot with my tray and night light."

But instead I remained calm. "No, I have furniture boxes."

But I conceded and moved my car over two spaces.

"What are you doing?" Sam wanted to know. He was ready to go home and this was an unwanted delay.

"That man asked me to move my car. He thinks I took his parking space. I think he is being rude."

"But why do you have to move?" Sam asked.

"Because he's an asshole." I unfortunately replied.

I moved the car and after a 15-minute wait they brought out my TV stand - in two large boxes. I was able to load the first one easily - it was big but light. The second box was a different story. Not only was it heavy, but it was 7 feet long. I stood it on its end and tried 'twisting' it from the loading dock to the car. About the time I hefted one end into the car, someone tapped me on the shoulder.

"Let me help you."

It was him.

"I was very rude to you earlier. The least I can do is help you with this."

"I understand. I've been there. But I appreciate the help."

"No, it's not. I'd been in that store 4 hours and I was frustrated and I was rude."

He helped me load the last box. Then he got in the car and made sure both boxes were secure.

When he got out I thanked him again, shook his hand and told him I hoped his day would get better.

As we drove away Sam said, "That was nice of him to apologize."

And I told him, yes, it is. It was wrong of him to be rude, but it was wrong of me to so quickly criticize him. IKEA has that affect on people.

As we drove home I thought what I would say to him if I could redo the conversation. I think I would've said "Thank you for the apology. I am sorry too. Thank you for letting my son see us resolve this peacefully. Thank you for letting him see you apologize and doing something chivalrous. Thank you for letting him see me not lose my cool and be gracious."

Now if I could just take back the 'asshole' part.